The People's Choice
So I have this new job. In general it's boring and simple but pays well and offers benefits and untaxed rta passes. I am good at it.
I was offered a position with Inspiration Corporation tonight. I was planning on accepting and there is no information you need to know about this. So starting tonight, I have to jobs...
This sounds great right? A job to support me that really offers nothing to the world and a place where I can make real connections and be in real relationships with people.
Here is the hard thing...
I received a call today from the coffee shop around the corner that I have fallen in love with. It's great people, great product, great education, and you can buy without guilt. I have an interview on Thursday at 4:30...
This would be no dilema if I didn't already have a job where I felt loyal to people... I can't just walk away if I am in fact offered a position at this coffee shop... this is what I want to do when I am in Chicago though... I have to walk away.
People! Help me. Either justify (if i was to make the decision to leave my new job) me breaking up with my employer or tell me that I need to stick to the commitment I have made and sacrifice what I want.
Goals for the week:
Dear Jessica, I still do visit your page.
Run, Read, Clean, Direct Deposit, Transit Card, Ask a new person to hang out, Get an interview, Talk to my boss about WV... and so much more.
Who wants to visit Chicago???
Yikes.
Twice in one day.
After searching through every possible person's blog I could find, I realized that I am glad that you all do not read my blog. What I am writing about is pointless and hopefully not defining. While it's really flattering (I'm a loser) when someone adds me as a link on their page, I feel confident knowing that nobody stumbles this way... and it helps deter people when you write very little.
I hope to bring up the level of content on this page. After all I am devoting so much time to this project.
Do you know what is really frustrating? I am sure you have your own ideas... but I am really only asking about mine. Anyway the frustrating thing... is finding out how little people care about each other. It seems as though (to me) our culture (when played out perfectly) says that we should put our family first and after that how you deal with people doesn't matter. I know that I am not going to put this as carefully as I should... but I don't know that I can really articulate what I am thinking. Ok let's go.
Concerning commitments:
Because of guilt and obligation and selfish feelings, people (the normal kind) (only opinion) will follow through with the plans they make with their families. Not everyone does it because of these reasons, but most do when it comes down to wanting to break the commitment. Do you know what I mean? Like mostly I want to see my mother but when it comes to the day and I am just feeling poopy and not like trying to communicate, because she is the woman who kind of raised me and because she has power over me like no other woman... I will keep to the commitment. (All of you probably know that using me as an example is bad because I am not as close to my family and this is why this particular issue haunts me).
Now the friend test:
Your friends don't want to be with you if you don't want to be with them... so they will accept your flakiness...
Or
Your friends will not make you feel guilty they will only talk about you behind your back... so screw them.
Am I being harsh? Do relationships not play out this way?
Here is the full circle. As I was reading all of the blogs today, it was difficult thinking that anyone of these people were like that. They are all people who stick to their word but also change their minds and when they do their friends understand. They know that family can be hard but it is essential because they are they people that when you move away you don't grow distant (I am guessing). I am not conveying my point as well as I want... All I want to say is that I missed my chance to grow relationships with these people and I am sad. I love my friends and all but let me tell you that there are not many of them and none of them live close to me. How am I to find people like you here? I can't believe that I expect too much from friendships because I have all of these examples...
I miss Athens... but let's not pretend that I would truly take advantage of the people that I wish I were friends with now... I know that I am too something to do that. I think resentful is the something... I am sorry if you don't know what that means.
Can I tell you that I am resentful about any faith community that I interacted in there... would you forgive me for that? Would you understand why I have carried that around and not given it up? Do you think I am a stubborn ass?
The point:
I am looking for friends who:
1. Care about important things... like poverty, and the homeless, and AIDS, and the environment, and about not hurting others...
2. Cares about me
3. Thinks that I have plenty of flaws
4. Likes talking and enjoys listening
5. Encourages and rebukes me
6. Isn't fake but rather genuine with the general public... in the kind way... like Ellen Botkin or Amy Popp
Another Point:
I think that only responding to your family because of good or bad motives sucks.
The Last Point:
I don't actually know anything.
Hey! You have a real job right?
Do they lay out in your "worker manual" or book of rules and regulations, that you must wear lipstick, eyeshadow, mascara, and blush? Yeah I didn't think so. We all have dress codes but seriously I have never seen or heard makeup anything but encouraged. I learned a lot about my new job on Friday. Apparently I will be warned when the president is heading over to check in on me and will be told to check my makeup. Another funny thing... I don't even get to accessorize by myself. I don't know if I told you that I will be wearing a dress... or that some time this week I get to go to Macy's with a personal shopper and pick out work shoes... but this is the kicker... the building manager will be providing us with (fake) pearl necklaces. Oh yeah, and even during the summer hose or tights are a must... spoken by Matt (HR guy) himself "we are a company that wears hose." I laughed when Matt was encouraging the undergarments and wanted to ask if he came to work everyday with hose on under his suit.
Since I have never been good at makeup, I went to Aveda yesterday to buy some new stuff (and schedule an appointment to get my hair cut). I was waiting waiting waiting for someone to help me and finally Danny walked up. Notice the y this was no Danni... whatever he was the only one asking if I needed any help so I excitedly said yes! I needed someone to help me match foundation to my skin tone. He was actually really great even though he seemed very nervous. He made sure that the woman who rang me up knew that he helped me and asked me that next time I came in for a "service" that I would request him. He was so dang adorable of course I would.
So if on Monday someone does not say "hey you look great," I will surely cry. Looking good is too hard ladies... I am no good at it!
Remeber the application process?
I got the job. I am now a greeter! What does a greeter do? Yeah, it's just like it sounds. My job is to greet people into the USB building and direct them to where they need to go. It comes with benefits and the hourly wage is enough to support myself while only working 40 hours a week. That's a little too boring for me though. I am still planning on finding a part-time job. I should have an interview with Inspiration Corporation either today or some time soon. I don't know if I mentioned that this organization (Inspiration) reminds me a lot of Good Works. I found them when looking around for a cause to sponsor when I hopefully run the Chicago Marathon. Anyway, no worries, I have a source of income.
Big News... I don't know if I am allowed to tell you... but I will... Chris has been invited to shoot a documentary in Ubumi, Zambia in June or July. We are both exploring the possibility of going.
The Long Search
It has never taken me so long to find a job! Any advice?
I continued the "application process" yesterday and my first face to face interview (which was yesterday) went really well. My interviewer and I seemed to have chemistry... which actually never happens for me because I hate talking myself up... it's just unnatural. Anyway, we went across the street to where I could potentially be working for my second interview... and since the property manager's assistant called off sick, apparently the property manager forgot about this confirmed meeting. My first interviewer told me that this really hurt my chances of getting the job. He still took me to another building to give me a better idea about what my job would be if I were to work for them. I think I would like it. They don't have another opening until March. I am turning in an application at Argo Tea (where Chris works but a different location) today.
At least not having a job gives you the chance to go on more runs... yay.
Rompin' In the Woods
West Virginia! I am starting to get very excited for my skiing adventure during the last weekend of February! A group of girls (yoohoo to only girls) are going to Colleen's family's little WV house to ski and eat and romp and read and do whatever we want for a couple of days. This vacation will include some of my favorite people... yay!
I had a thing today. I say thing because you can't say "I had an interview process today." That's what Matt ( the guy who could some day be my boss) called it. I filled out an application (even though they had 2 copies of my resume), took a grammar test, as well as a typing, word, and excel test. The bad part about my job hunt today was that it was excruciatingly cold and I had some bus trouble. I go back on Thursday.
There has been no communication with Inspiration Corporation for the last couple of days.
I think I might be getting sick. Which is making me rethink running in the horrible cold.
Tomorrow it should be a little warmer so I will think about running then.
Just Doing It
Thanks! Yesterday I went running around 4 or 5 and then today I went around noon. So both days I have gone, but I know that I am not pushing myself as much as I could. I also don't have a track or a screen to tell me how far or fast I am going. I also don't have a good watch. Today I did some other things to tone my rather large muscles (right), but still do not feel satified. I am envious of your gyms. I feel wind burnt with a soar throat after each run. Chris went with me today so I at least had someone that "I didn't want to think I was a loser so I wouldn't stop running." ( I don't know if it is appropriate to put quotes or hyphens there).
In other news, I am playing the Wii and feeling soar. Wii tennis and bowling are really fun games but they make your right wrist and forearm quite achy.
We also have these things in our apt.:
1.) an XBOX
2.) another XBOX
3.) and a sound system
welcome to boy land.
I Haven't Decided Yet
So this running thing is still annoying. The only way that I was able to run before was that Amy made me... I made her make me. So Lyndsey T, and H, where do you find your motivation? I mean part of why I haven't said yes to this 1/2 marathon is because I don't think I will actually be running that much at that point. I need someone to make me do it... hmm accountability please.
I still don't have a job. I was really screwed over by my SB manager, so I am no longer able to transfer... which also means that I don't have benefits right now. I have had one interview so far and I should find out the results of that today. I have had many conversations that were like "well you'll have to jump through this hoop and then this one and don't forget that one."
I have almost given up on the inspiration corporation. That job would make me feel worth while and I am just letting it go. I might send them an email to check on my resume. I don't know.
Yikes.
